Blogizdat

I was recently asked if I had made any resolutions for the new year, and in all candor, I had not. I mean, I'm constantly making resolutions, all the time, constantly resolving to do better or different, and constantly falling short, and the idea of making up a proper New Year's Resolution List has always seemed a bit overwhelming to me

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Current Location: Neither here nor there
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: MiNa - Living In Between

It's the 8th anniversary of the attack on the United States by Osama Bin Ladin's Jihadistas, and it's strange how the world has changed, and yet how much remains the same.

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Current Location: On The Ground
Current Mood: sad
Current Music: Randy Newman - I Just Want You To Hurt Like I Do

I drove to the cemetery today and went for a long walk.

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* Today is Friday.
* I'm off work today.
* It's the first day of a Daddy Duty Weekend.
* I need to fill the bird feeder in the walnut tree sometimes this weekend.
* The tree is huge, more than thirty feet tall.
* My left foot really hurts.
* My sinuses also hurt.

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Current Location: Na Tônga Da Mironga Do Cabuletê
Current Mood: drained
Current Music: Jesus Mozart - A LIttle Nacho Music

* It's early, the house is quiet and I'm getting ready for work.
* I've been working for thirty years, now, actually, nearly thirty-five, if you count part-time work during college.
* I will qualify for a full pension in another six years.
* There's no way in h*ll I'll be able to afford to retire then.
* I was moved to a different location at work yesterday, spent a lot of time this week cleaning my cubicle and packing things up.
* I feel really tired right now.
* I wonder if I'm anemic - or something worse.
* I always imagine the worst.

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Current Location: In Between
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: Legião Urbana - Eu Sei

• It's been hot and humid today.
• It hasn't been that hot for most of the summer.
• The storms and tornadoes tonight wasn't unexpected.
• I actually got out walking for a half hour this afternoon, and it was horrid-muggy.
• My foot has been hurting pretty bad today.
• I'm still recovering from the bronchitis that came on me last week.
• Went out to the Old Country Buffet for breakfast with the family today.
• I'm always amazed how heavy the patrons are at OCB.
• I'm also amazed at the amount they eat.
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Current Location: Down Below
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: Sarah Blasko - All I Want

Woke up today feeling wretched, with a blistering-red sore throat, some kind of bronchial infection, and that general achiness and malaise that comes with it all.

I hate this.

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Current Location: horizontal
Current Mood: sick
Current Music: Paul Young - Everytime You Go Away

Hair Color: dark red with a touch of gray

Eye Color: kind of blue-green

Height: about two meters

Profession: case worker

Relationship Status: married

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Current Location: off in the distance
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: new order - blue monday

My dad died 23 years ago, yesterday, and I still miss him as intensely today as I did when he died, just not quite as often, and I think I miss my little sister - who died on July 28, 1966 - even more.

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Current Location: notstanding in his field
Current Mood: disappointed
Current Music: Nick Cave - The Ship Song

See, I have a head chock-full of thoughts that I'd be loathe to write, even under a pseudonym, but I have to wonder how I would write if I weren't bound by decorum, common decency and courtesy for others.

I mean, it really goes to the question of artistic honesty, doesn't it? Oh sure, it worked for Henry Miller and Anais Nin, up to a point, in that they would write of things most others dare not whisper, but most of us don't want to hear the truth, indeed, we *want* to be lied to.

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Current Location: a place called vertigo
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: u2 - stuck in a moment you can't get out of

I have a million things running around my head at the moment, and what keeps coming to mind are song lyrics.

No, really.

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Current Location: Oustanding In My Field
Current Mood: blank
Current Music: The House Of Love - 'Crush Me'

Like the rest of the world, I was stunned at the death of Michael Jackson this past week. Then again, maybe not. I mean, he was kind of mess, really, with the disfiguring scars of his many plastic surgeries, and the obvious emotional traumas of his childhood that were still being played out well into his middle-age.

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Current Location: on the edge of the Dark Place
Current Mood: exhausted
Current Music: Michael Jackson - Smooth Criminal

It's been a cool and overcast day, the kind that one usually associates with Seattle and/or London - though I've been in Seattle and seen the sunshine, so I have to wonder if that's not just a myth - but it's also the kind of day that most people would call 'dreary,' and indeed, there've been times when I've found such days to be on the dismal side.

But you know, mostly I find gray days like this to be soothing, cause bright sunshine tends to hurts my eyes, and I guess I'm actually left a bit more mellow for all the soft light of a truly cloudy day.

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Current Location: Chained To The Pillars
Current Mood: Com Saudades
Current Music: Regina Spektor - Samson

I'm having a 'meh' day, in the middle of a 'meh' week - okay, it's far more than a simple 'meh' - and there's not much I can to to ameliorate that right now, cause it's all about those things I cannot control.

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Current Location: The Dark Place
Current Mood: exhausted
Current Music: Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah

Okay, something I really dislike - and I dislike it about myself, too - is when people use words in ways that are different than what they appear to really mean.

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Current Location: Almost There
Current Mood: pissed off
Current Music: David Bowie - Oh You Pretty Things

I was thinking just now about when I started blogging, on Livejournal, and I remember exactly how it all happened, what prompted me to dip my toe into the water, as it were, and who my first readers were.

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Current Location: In There Somewhere
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: Missy Higgins - The Sound Of White

Okay, I keep promising to post more here - both clippings and writing - and I really do mean it, but something keeps coming up, either I get really busy, or I find myself feeling mute, or I end up mired in the swamps & quicksands of The Dark Place, or something - there's always something - but I'm determined to try, even if nothing ambitious, I'll aim for something weekly, and maybe go from there.

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Current Location: In Front Of The Windmills
Current Mood: quixotic
Current Music: Elliott Smith - Let's Get Lost

Okay, someone else already wrote a book or two on the subject - there's even a movie out by the name, check Amazon for the DVD info - but maybe I can still add something to the topic.

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Current Location: in between grass and hay
Current Mood: sleepy
Current Music: mina - living in between

I just got a call from my brother telling me my aunt was killed in a freeway car crash this evening around suppertime. Apparently an SUV blew a tire, crossed the median and struck several vehicles, including one being driven by my aunt, and she died at the scene.

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Current Location: In Tears
Current Mood: shocked
Current Music: Taize' - Hallelujah

I've been going full-tilt in the Facebook world for nearly a year now, sometimes posting lots, sometimes posting little, and for all my carping about it, I don't hate it, I really don't - in fact, I kind of like it, if I can accept its limitations.

But the thing is, even though it's possible to write longer pieces on FB, some people actually get cranky about it, and one person I know even went so far as to 'de-friend' me for posting too often, told me it was annoying that I posted so many little things to my FB Wall.

Of course, I know there are at least a dozen of my nearly ten dozen Facebook Friends who not only read, but actually seem to enjoy what I post - or at least they say they do - and what's more, Facebook has allowed me to reconnect with some old friends with whom I'd lost touch for years, and to have some level of contact with persons who'd otherwise be out of my life altogether.

But, with all that said, there's still something a bit disturbing about the whole FB experience.

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Current Location: far from the maddening crowd
Current Mood: melancholy
Current Music: Missy HIggins - The Sound Of White